36 universal skills. One shared language.

• Noticing when a feeling starts
• Naming emotions with precise words (frustrated, disappointed, nervous, proud)
• Rating how big a feeling is
• Noticing body signals (tight chest, hot face, stomachache)
• Recognizing my triggers
• Noticing mixed feelings
• Understanding how feelings shape my thoughts and actions
• Noticing patterns in when I feel a certain way
• Noticing what I'm grateful for

Try it: Use a feelings word list at dinner to name one feeling from today and where you felt it in your body.

• Using calming strategies (breathing, movement, counting, a calm spot)
• Tolerating frustration and disappointment
• Pausing before reacting
• Managing impulses
• Taking space and coming back
• Putting feelings into words
• Recovering after a hard moment
• Knowing when and how to seek support

Try it: Make a family list of calm-down strategies and post it on the fridge.

• Naming my strengths
• Naming what takes more effort
• Noticing patterns in my work
• Recognizing what comes easily
• Knowing how I learn best (seeing, hearing, doing, talking it through)
• Knowing the conditions I work best in
• Recognizing my growth over time
• Asking others what they see in me

Try it: Each person names one strength they saw in someone else this week.

• Tolerating difficulty and not knowing yet
• Trying again after a setback
• Breaking a problem into smaller steps
• Trying a different strategy
• Practicing to get better
• Asking for help without giving up
• Using encouraging self-talk
• Knowing when to keep going and when to change course

Try it: Pick a hard puzzle, build or recipe and stick with it together.

• Naming my values
• Explaining why something matters to me
• Noticing where my values come from (family, culture, faith, experience)
• Noticing when two of my values pull in different directions
• Noticing values in other people's choices
• Developing my own beliefs and principles
• Revisiting beliefs as I learn

Try it: Each person picks their top three from a values list and tells the story behind one.

• Noticing when my actions match or don't match my values
• Telling the truth when it's hard
• Keeping promises
• Owning my choices and their results
• Making it right when I fall short
• Standing by my beliefs under pressure
• Reflecting on the kind of person I want to be

Try it: Share a time this week you did the right thing when it was hard.

• Knowing what I like and dislike
• Exploring new interests
• Noticing what makes time fly
• Noticing what energizes or drains me
• Understanding my preferences (noise, people, routine, novelty)
• Telling a preference from a need
• Sharing my interests with others

Try it: Make a list of screen-free things you love and do one of them.

• Handling a change in plans
• Living with uncertainty
• Considering other options
• Trying unfamiliar foods, activities or people
• Adjusting my expectations
• Shifting strategies when one isn't working
• Balancing my preferences with what the group needs
• Finding something good in a change

Try it: Try one new thing: a game, a recipe or a new route for a walk.

• Knowing my roles at home, at school and in groups
• Knowing what is mine to do and what is someone else's
• Knowing who is counting on me and for what
• Following through on commitments
• Owning my mistakes without blaming
• Accountability
• Noticing when I have said yes to too much

Try it: Make a family chart of who is counting on whom for what this week.

• Planning and prioritizing
• Remembering what I need
• Keeping track of my belongings
• Starting tasks without putting them off
• Finishing what I start
• Estimating how long things take
• Building routines
• Managing distractions, including devices
• Noticing where my time and attention go
• Choosing how to spend free time

Try it: Estimate how long making dinner will take, then time it.

• Physical needs (food, water, sleep, movement)
• Emotional needs (comfort, reassurance, time alone)
• Social needs (connection, belonging)
• Sensory needs (quiet, less light, movement, pressure)
• The need for rest, space, help or challenge
• Telling needs from wants
• Noticing early signs that a need isn't being met

Try it: Before the evening starts, everyone names one thing they need tonight.

• Hygiene (bathing, brushing teeth, clean clothes)
• Sleep routines
• Nutrition and hydration
• Movement and exercise
• Rest and downtime
• Balancing activity and quiet
• Healthy screen and technology habits
• Noticing when my body or mind needs care
• Asking for care when I need it

Try it: On Wednesday morning, notice how a screen-free evening affected your sleep and mood.

• Noticing signs of others' feelings
• Asking how someone feels instead of guessing
• Responding with comfort, space or celebration
• Noticing what others need or want
• Recognizing that others may feel differently than I do
• Balancing my needs with others' needs
• Taking turns getting what we want
• Staying with someone's hard feelings without rushing to fix them

Try it: Ask each person, "What was the best and hardest part of your day?" and just listen.

• Greetings and goodbyes
• Introducing myself and others
• Taking turns
• Saying please and thank you
• Joining a conversation
• Ending a conversation
• Sharing space
• Making invitations
• Responding to invitations
• Everyday consideration

Try it: Practice introductions: family members introduce each other to an imaginary guest.

• Noticing what is going well
• Noticing kindness and effort in others
• Naming what I'm grateful for
• Appreciating people, places and experiences
• Noticing strengths and positive qualities in others
• Savoring good moments
• Finding something positive in a hard day without ignoring hard feelings

Try it: At dinner, each person names one thing that went well today and one person they are grateful for.

• Sharing feelings
• Expressing needs clearly
• Listening without interrupting
• Asking follow-up questions
• Showing interest in others' lives
• Remembering what matters to others
• Spending time together
• Keeping friendships going
• Developing trust over time
• Expressing gratitude and appreciation

Try it: Use the month's conversation cards at dinner.

• Perspective-taking (imagining how it looks from someone else's place)
• Recognizing different experiences
• Learning about cultures, identities, abilities and beliefs
• Being curious rather than judgmental about differences
• Asking questions to understand
• Knowing my perspective is one of many
• Changing my mind when I learn more

Try it: Ask a grandparent or older relative about their childhood and compare it with yours.

• Sharing the work and dividing tasks
• Contributing my ideas and building on others' ideas
• Compromising and making group decisions
• Checking in on progress
• Asking for, offering and accepting help
• Taking initiative
• Stepping up to lead
• Supporting someone else's leadership and following well
• Helping others shine

Try it: Cook dinner as a team: one person leads, everyone has a job, and next week someone new leads.

• Reading facial expressions
• Noticing tone of voice
• Reading body language
• Understanding context (what fits a library vs. a playground)
• Noticing group dynamics
• Recognizing when someone wants to join, speak, stop, leave or have space
• Noticing who is left out

Try it: Play charades or "guess the feeling" using only faces.

• Knowing my own limits
• Saying yes and no clearly
• Communicating limits kindly
• Hearing and honoring someone else's no
• Asking permission
• Giving people space
• Changing my mind
• Recognizing healthy and unhealthy relationship patterns

Try it: Role-play saying no kindly and hearing no gracefully.

• Noticing who is doing more of the work, at home, in class or in a group
• Noticing who gets more time, turns, attention or talking time, and who gets less
• Sharing the load, including chores, cleanup and the jobs nobody wants
• Noticing when someone is excluded
• Inviting others in
• Making room for quieter voices
• Understanding that fair does not always mean identical
• Speaking up when the work or the time is not shared fairly

Try it: List everything it takes to run the evening (cooking, cleanup, planning), then check together: is the work shared fairly?

• Noticing when something is unfair or someone is being hurt
• Being an upstander, not a bystander
• Speaking up kindly and clearly
• Getting help from a trusted adult when needed
• Standing with someone who is left out or treated unfairly
• Asking how someone wants to be supported
• Working with others to change unfair rules or routines
• Knowing that small actions can lead to change

Try it: Talk about a time someone stood up for someone else, in real life or in a book, and what you could do in a moment like that.

• Recognizing how words and actions affect others
• Considering impact before acting
• Noticing unintended impact
• Understanding that intention and impact can be different
• Owning my impact even when I didn't mean it
• Adjusting what I do based on how it lands

Try it: Share one thing someone did this week that had a big impact on you.

• Disagreeing without attacking
• Calming down before talking it through
• Listening after something goes wrong
• Acknowledging my part and its impact
• Giving a real apology
• Making amends
• Problem-solving together
• Rebuilding trust
• Understanding that repair can take time
• Forgiving

Try it: Talk through one thing that went wrong this week and how to repair it.

• Wondering
• Asking questions
• Following my interests
• Investigating
• Experimenting
• Noticing details
• Seeking new experiences
• Stepping outside my comfort zone
• Seeking experiences beyond my own identity and community
• Staying curious when I don't know the answer

Try it: Take a noticing walk and bring back three questions.

• Brainstorming
• Proposing solutions
• Designing
• Making
• Inventing
• Contributing ideas
• Helping groups solve problems

Try it: Design a better way to handle one family routine (mornings, laundry, chores).

• Active listening
• Reading comprehension
• Observing closely
• Asking clarifying questions
• Identifying main ideas
• Summarizing in my own words
• Finding information
• Evaluating sources
• Telling fact from opinion
• Checking claims
• Recognizing misinformation and advertising
• Comparing sources
• Using evidence
• Understanding how we know something

Try it: Read a newspaper article together, retell it, and ask: how do we know this is true?

• Speaking
• Writing
• Presenting
• Storytelling
• Choosing how to communicate (talk, write, draw, show)
• Adjusting detail, tone and format for the listener
• Considering what an audience needs to know

Try it: Teach a younger family member how to do something you're good at.

• Noticing whether I'm consuming (watching, scrolling, reading) or creating (making, building, writing, sharing)
• Choosing what to watch, read or play on purpose instead of letting a feed choose for me
• Noticing how apps, feeds and algorithms decide what I see and what they leave out
• Recognizing when I'm scrolling to avoid a feeling, boredom or a task
• Knowing when to stop, and stopping
• Seeking ideas, people and sources outside my usual circle, comfort zone and identity
• Engaging with views I disagree with to understand them
• Using technology as a tool to create, learn and connect, not just to pass time
• Balancing screen time with hands-on, in-person and outdoor experiences

Try it: Before the evening starts, each person names one thing they usually consume and one thing they'll create instead tonight.

• Knowing how my family, school and town make decisions
• Taking part in community events and projects
• Volunteering my time
• Using my voice and vote in groups
• Being kind, honest and safe online
• Following through on commitments to my community
• Using what I learn to help solve real problems
• Working with others for the common good

Try it: Pick one way to help your community this month, like a neighbor, a food shelf or a town event, and plan it together.

• Defining the problem
• Questioning assumptions
• Comparing possibilities
• Recognizing bias, including my own
• Considering consequences
• Testing solutions
• Changing my thinking when the evidence changes

Try it: Solve a real household problem together.

• Giving specific, kind, useful feedback
• Explaining my reasoning
• Supporting ideas with evidence
• Sharing accurate information
• Telling what I know from what I think

Try it: Give each person one specific "glow" (what went well) and one "grow" (what to try next).

• Recognizing patterns
• Cause and effect
• Making connections between ideas
• Understanding systems (a family, a school, an ecosystem)
• Considering unintended consequences
• Seeing the bigger picture

Try it: Trace what happens to food from the store to the table to the trash.

• Caring for shared spaces and materials
• Reducing waste, reusing and repairing
• Caring for plants, animals and outdoor places
• Noticing how my choices affect the environment and my community
• Leaving places better than I found them
• Thinking about future generations

Try it: Take a family walk and pick up litter, or start a small garden or repair project.

• Generating ideas
• Imagining what could be
• Experimenting
• Learning from mistakes
• Receiving feedback
• Revising
• Improving
• Combining ideas in new ways

Try it: Build something, get feedback, then make version 2.

• Sharing ideas and opinions
• Expressing feelings
• Creativity and art
• Humor and storytelling
• Developing my own voice
• Communicating my needs
• Asking for help or clarification
• Explaining what isn't working
• Taking part in decisions that affect me

Try it: Everyone gets a say in planning the evening, then each person shares a story, drawing or song.